Martha, Martha...I mean; Kristina, Kristina...
When you realize how similar you are to Martha; things start to make sense. At least in my world, they do. My anxiety level for this week has been minimal. I don't know if it is because the weather has been beautiful or the fact that I finally got some much-needed answers on some medical stuff. Whatever it is I sure am thankful for it. Even when I don't have an abundance of anxiety issues I still stay in God's Word. Because it seems like when I step out of the Word my anxiety gets increasingly worse.
This week I went to the doctor to get an MRI done on my hip because of this pain. Come to find out I have a tear in the muscle in my hip. However, there is fluid build-up around the tear and that is apparently healing the tear. There is one thing that I have to get used to though, and that is the fact that I have to tone down my activity. I basically have to put myself on light duty until my hip heals. This is so extensively difficult to do! But I want to get better and I want to be out of pain so it is something that inevitably has to be done.
The biblical verse that I have been turning to this week has been in the book of Luke. It is Luke 10: 41-42 and it is about Martha.
41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
I get mesmerized every time I read a verse where the Lord is actually talking to someone. I don't know why it still surprises me, but it does. I really think it is because when I pray, I pray so personally to God. There are times when I have heard the Lord speak back to me and instruct me on what to do. So I know how Martha feels in this verse. If this is making any sense at all. Sometimes I confuse myself when I talk about my own prayers. Simply because they are just conversations that I have between myself and God. When I tell other people they look at me like I am crazy. So I am quite used to that.
But with this particular verse, I put myself in Martha's shoes. If the Lord were to tell me that I worry and I am upset about too many things; then I know I need to make adjustments. He is telling Martha this because he wants her to choose what is best for her. So, all in all, I would choose what is best for me. Or at least what I think would be best for me. It is a slippery slope. But if God tells you to do something or tells you to reevaluate something, just do it.
I continually pray for peace over myself and my loved ones. The removal of anxiety would be ideal, but I know that is not the reality. There are going to be times when I get anxious and feel overwhelmed. Those are the times when I just need to step back, reevaluate, and make the decision that is right for me. That is the difficult part. Thinking of myself over someone else. I am certainly not used to that. But that is definitely something I am working on.
Until next time.
Kristina
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